The center of a Blow Pop. That’s what it’s like to hold my breath. The uneaten half of a Tootsie Roll. I’ve got candy on the brain. Substantial unanimity. For the good of the whole. Holding my breath.
Swimming across the pool. Remember that John Cheever short story where the whole story is about him swimming from pool to pool to pool in his neighborhood? But then when you read further about his life, you find out he lived in a groundskeeper’s cottage on a wealthier man’s estate.
Puddle to puddle to puddle.
The story about the pool, what was the name of it? There was one about a radio, too. They stick in my mind like white on rice. Like white on rice; the rice can’t shake it. I prefer brown rice – more vitamins and roughage. I switched over a long time ago. Unless I’m going to have barbecue hash, Southern style. In which case, I go for the white rice every time.
I have to get Mom to go to that barbecue place in Georgia we always go to. I can’t remember the name of that place either. Just that they have green rocking chairs and a creek running under a bridge you walk over to get to the restaurant. And then you dive up some stairs and it’s always real crowded. And they give those peppermint soft sucking mints at the end to freshen the breath.
Holding my breath.
I hold my breath when I am afraid. And then again right before I’m going to blow the seeds off a dandelion. Remember Ray Bradbury’s Dandelion Wine? When I was a freshman in college an artist friend named Anne introduced me to Ray Bradbury. He wrote a great book on writing. I like to read what famous writers have to say about writing.
I think I like it because I know they are going to say the same things I already know. Practice. Write a lot. Tell the truth. Write every day. Don’t mince words. Keep your day job. Find community. They never talk about the money. I wonder why they never tell you how poor you’re going to be in the early years? Maybe your whole life.
How many writers do we hear about that die before their work really hits the big time. I have heard of writers who become famous and then quit and go back to their day jobs because writing is too much work. That one on The Writer’s Almanac that Garrison Keillor was talking about in the background one morning when I was making a bologna sandwich to drop into my purple lunch bucket on the way to my part time day job.
Holding my breath. I used to take pride in diving into Granddaddy’s pool and being able to swim the whole under length without coming up for air. Sometimes that’s how I feel. Like I want to come up for air. But I’ve already broken the surface. And I know I’m breathing in.
Friday, May 4th, 2007
[…] – PRACTICE – Holding My Breath – 10min […]
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[…] – PRACTICE – Holding My Breath – 10min […]
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a lot going on here–much more than breaking the surface–liked this.
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Scot, thank you for reviving this writing practice. Sometimes time rolls by and I forget what I’ve written. I probably haven’t reread this practice since it was written almost a year ago. But when I did just now, so many memories came alive for me:
reading Cheever’s short stories for Taos, Dandelion Wine, going to Georgia, eating at Sconyer’s (yes, that’s the name of the BBQ place in Augusta), holding my breath while racing my brother across the bottom of Granddaddy’s pool, how scared I can sometimes get about everything surrounding the writing life, wondering if I will ever make enough money from all the different writing balls I have juggling in the air.
It’s good to go back and remember. Thank you for that.
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Oh, QM, Sconyer’s! I used the last of my BBQ sauce from there for the pulled pork BBQ that I made for MOM’s 70th birthday surprise. R3 donated his last 2 bottles(his private stash!), but I only needed to use 1 of his in addition to mine! Thanks to Scot for his comment as I had never seen this post (And I often visit the Archives to see what I have missed!) Great post & as your said, Sconyer’s is the BEST BBQ in Augusta. What fond memories! I heard a rumor that Daddy might visit at the end of April! We need to talk to him & see if he can replenish our stock of sauce! D
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QM, I forgot to comment on the body of this post. Your words “I wonder why they never tell you how poor you’re going to be in the early years? Maybe your whole your life.”
Well, they can teach & we can absorb what they they teach. We can follow through with our dreams or not. There is absolutely nothing wrong with holding our breath & going forward. We do what we feel we were sent here to do & we should enjoy every minute of what we decide to do with our lives. I have visited the School of Hard Knocks at almost every turn in my life. I managed to turn every corner & so far, no regrets!
There was a time long ago that I would have given anything to have bologna on my mustard sandwich, but I had more hope at that time & am so happy now that those desperate times are long gone. I look forward (holding my breath) to a glorious future ahead of me. I am thankful for the School of Hard Knocks! Artists, singers, writers , actors, etc. I say go forward, no matter what ! Follow your desires. Take the lumps & bumps as a lesson well learned. Follow your dreams & desires. The air you need will always be there if you believe in yourself! “Puddle to puddle to puddle”…D
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diddy, I remember R3’s stash of BBQ sauce from Sconyer’s going into Mom’s 70th birthday BBQ. It was SO good, too. I usually get the BBQ hash on rice when I’m there. I haven’t found it up here. And I just love that stuff.
I didn’t know Daddy was coming back at the end of April. That’s great. I hope it works out. Sounds like he had a great time last time he was there. FUN coming up for ya’ll!
Puddle to puddle to puddle, I’m going to keep going. When I read this practice again this morning, I realized a lot has happened in the last year. I’m in a different place. I have doubts sometimes but they are not as strong, take a different form. I still get scared. But it seems like part of the process.
I’ve seen a lot of writers speak over the last few years though, and it’s good to hear them talk about their work and their creative processes. They don’t give up, no matter what. They get good at waiting. Projects take time, sometimes years. Like you, I plan to keep showing up. 8)
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[…] to posts: haiku 2 (one-a-day), PRACTICE — Holding My Breath – 10min, The Vitality Of Place — Preserving The Legacy Of “Home” Possibly related posts: […]
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