Yesterday Dee asks, “If you could fly or hold your breath underwater, which would you choose?” At first I think she means fly in a plane, and for a moment I don’t understand the relationship between planes and holding your breath.
She tries me again. “If you could fly like a bird with wings or swim underwater like a fish, which would you choose?” “Fly,” I say, no hesitation. “Me, too,” she says. We are sitting in the living room. I’m drawing. Jim is reading the newspaper. The girls are on the floor working on homework. We are a picture, I think.
Then I try my if-this-then-what? question on Dee. “If you had no choice but these, would you rather be killed by a shark in the ocean or a grizzly bear in the mountains?” Jim shoots me a look over the top of the newspaper. “Shark,” Dee says.
I’m surprised. She liked flying over swimming, which tells me she prefers air over water, blue sky over black sea. Why not mountains over oceans, then? Why a shark? I’m pondering all this when Dee starts to retract her answer. Or rather, protest the question entirely.
“I wouldn’t want to die at all,” she says. Egads, I think, what am I doing asking her this question? Sometimes I treat her more like an 18-year-old. “The grizzly bear ate off Grizzly Man’s face,” she says, and now there is concern in her voice. Jim stops reading. I’m wondering if she has any idea what a shark does to to you when it attacks.
“Grizzly Man was eaten by the grizzlies in Alaska,” Jim explains. Another thing I should never have done — make my daughters watch Grizzly Man with me. “He spent years with the grizzlies,” Jim continues. “The one that ate him was probably sick or so hungry it couldn’t help itself.”
“Birds,” I say. “Birds!” I say the word as if it were a burst. It startles. Jim and Dee and even Em who up to now has been silent on the floor all look at me and wait. I get up and start to flap my arms. “Birds, birds, birds,” I sing.
No one says anything more. No more man-eating grizzlies. No bloody oceans. Just wings to fly away.
🙂
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It is compelling to think about questions like these. Funny, some time over the last few nights, I was watching one of the late night talk shows, Letterman, I think, and a man was on there who had been attacked by a shark and survived.
His story was fascinating. He said he’d never forget the look in that shark’s eyes as he stared down into his mouth.
Hard choice, but I think I’d choose the Grizzly. I think I’d have a fighting chance on land. In the water, I’m probably sunk. A sinking feeling.
You are lucky to be surrounded by the creative imagination of kids. Beginner’s mind. What all of us creative types are trying constantly to get back to.
Thanks!
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I have to say, I’m fascinated by any kind of animal attack. Mountain lions, alligators. There’s a website–i’ll add the link in later–that is nothing but shark attack victim (surviving, mostly, I think) photos. I scroll through the site, my face in a horrific scowl, but I can’t tear myself away. I think Dee’s picked up on my fascination, although she’s too young to be into it the same way I am.
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A few years back, the Utne Reader had a great story about a woman surviving a salt-water crocodile attack in Australia. It was such a fascinating account I pointed it out to J.K., our English teacher. He read it and used it for a classroom lesson.
For me, I think I’d rather be taken down by a land animal (I sometimes think about this stuff when I am in open water on the kayak)…except a pack of hyenas. They are the scariest animals to me. Just in the way they are built is scary looking. Terrifying critters!
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I am the same way. I think as humans, we are drawn to things kind of dark and strange; things hard to imagine. I also like True Crime. I can’t believe the things people will do to each other. It’s much worse than anything the animals would ever do.
I’d be interested in that link. I’m about due for another horrific scowl. : – )
Hyenas! Yes, they have strange faces and crazed eyes. I wonder at their hyper energy. Were they just built that way?
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OK, since you asked for it. But it’s really gross (and for all I know, some of the photos are doctored, which I’d actually be relieved to discover): http://www.sharkattacks.com/bites.htm
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Oh, and btw, QM, if you’re answering my question (shark or grizzly), you can’t pick grizzly just because you think you could survive a land animal. The point is, you’re not going to survive either–so which one do you take? I still say grizzly. Can you imagine dying by animal attack while floating in the black sea awaiting death by animal attack??
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OH boy, that IS a gruesome site! Some of the stories look real. Some of those photos – I do wonder. Whew.
I was glad to see this at the bottom of the page:
“Sharks are in danger of extinction, especially the Great White shark.
Throughout the years Men have hunted the Great White, and other Sharks for Sport, Macho acts, Oil ,Fins, and fear. You must realize that men kill over 100 million sharks annually compare with the 10-15 people killed by sharks each year.”
Oh, we won’t survive either? HMMM. I still pick grizzly. I’d just rather have my scattered parts grounded on the good green earth.
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ybonesy,
I think you might be able to reason with a bear, but not a shark. I’ve had a couple of encounters with bears…black bears, not grizzlies.
Last year, I was in the middle of a 20 mile paddle approaching an island where we were going to have lunch when I saw the wake of the dorsal fin of a large fish in the water just ahead of my boat. These fish (there was more than one) were probably just wahoo but unsettling indeed…1.) its freaky to be in the middle of the sea in a small boat made of fabric stretched over wood. 2.) the closest land was small rock of an island still at least 1/2 mile in front of me. 3.) As you know, I’m a semi-desert rat land dweller, and was totally out of my element (but I like that element that I enjoy when I am doing it).
Dee’s question is a very profound. Ironically, learning to scuba dive is the closest thing I’ve experienced to flying like a bird. It’d be neat to fly like an actual bird with no noise.
mm
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Is fear of being in the middle of the sea caused by the fact that we’re land dwellers? Of does it have something to do with the movies we watched at an impressionable age (per this post where I also wrote about sharks)?
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[…] Apr 8th, 2007 by ybonesy The Scream: A New Mexico Phenomenon […]
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[…] Apr 7th, 2007 by ybonesy if you had the ability to fly with wings or swim hours underwater without coming up for air, which would you choose? I would be a bird… […]
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Hmmm… let’s compare the two to find the most terrifying:
Bear- Teddy Bears, Gummy Bears, Care Bears.
Sharks- “Jaws”, Teeth, Soulless Eyes, sh*t that makes you afraid to swim in a pool when you’re like 7.
I’d rather my death not sully the lovely reputation bears have garnered.
Another good question format is the old “which would win in a fight: X or Y?”
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That’s pretty selfless. I would pick the bear so his or her true nature could be revealed.
I’ll have to use that question format in the future. As in, which would win in a fight: ybonesy or lindo?
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dash, I’ve been thinking about your question “which would win in a fight: X or Y?” The Bear or the Shark? I have this scenario playing in my head. One is on land. One is in the sea. On land, the bear hands down. In the sea, well, the bear still has a fighting chance, as long as he can stand up. But in the middle of the ocean – the shark’s got it. Either way, I still vote for the bear as my way to go. Maybe I saw Jaws one too many times. 8)
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